Let me just be super clear from sentence one of this piece...this is not a political message. This is a "Jesus was kind to show me a parallel" kind of message. So here goes:
With so much talk and movement in regard to racism this last year, there was much for many to learn. I'm a white girl married to a Native American man and never thought one second about his race when we crossed paths. Really have never considered myself racist at all, but there was one statement made somewhere...maybe social media that caused me to reflect. The statement was something along the lines that just because you are nice to people of different cultures doesn't mean you aren't racist. This was confusing to me. I wondered what else is there?...what more can you be to someone than nice? And, I'm not leaning this towards "you can be nice and fight for other people's rights politically and on platforms, etc." Although if the Lord calls you to those places, you should take those steps, but for me the Lord's lesson here was different. It was more personal.If you are new here, and you don't know our testimony, you can find all the juice in the "About Me" section. Probably won't do you any good to keep reading until you do. But, our family bears a scarlet letter. One earned by sin that no one here denies. Now we have been incredibly blessed by people who the Lord has strategically placed in our lives to love us unconditionally - scarlet letter and all. But we have also crossed paths with people who are truly kind to us. They will never be outright cruel to our face, but they also could never intertwine their reputation with ours. They can wave to us, smile even, but to actually do real life with us is too risky...for our kind of scarlet letter cultivates fear and certainly judgment. At the end of the day, these people (usually professing Jesus lovers themselves) sleep at night clinging to the concept that they are "nice" to us.
This brings me to the parallel the Lord kindly revealed. This is what they mean by just being "nice" to someone of a different culture or race doesn't mean that you aren't racist. You can be courteous at the grocery store to someone different than you...you can even let them go ahead of you...but would you invite them over for dinner? Would you let their son marry your daughter? At what point is our surface level kindness just to help us to feel good about ourselves...help us sleep at night.
Now don't get me wrong...as I've already stated...our scarlet letter is a consequence of sin. Someone's race or culture is NOT a consequence of sin. It is just simply God's creative work. There is no one here that blames anyone for having to wrestle with the Lord to believe that he could reeeaaalllyyy renew and restore my husband, our marriage, our ugly. When someone struggles with being associated with people like "us", we understand. We are not entitled to nor do we rely on everyone's approval. However, for me, understanding why just being "nice" wasn't enough was far more tangible when I could see it through my own story.
And I can't leave this topic without touching on the cross ALL of our family bears due to my husband's sins. When we reconciled, many had concerns about how unfair it would be to me and especially our kids to have to be under this umbrella of judgment. Wise counsel in those days sweetly reminded me of how Jesus bore sins of far more sinners that were not his own. I would love to say that my children will somehow be promised immunity from this discrimination, but that has already proven untrue. The gift they are given in exchange, however, is a very unique perspective on just exactly what their Savior did for them.
We laid down, long ago, being their hero...or our own. There are so many different layers to discrimination whether perceived as deserved (like ours) or undeserved (like racism) . There is nothing about this piece meant to solve any world problems, but if it causes you to reflect at all on who and how you associate with those around you, then sit in it for a minute. Jesus never just smiled and waved as broken or different walked by. He dove in, invested, brought healing, shared meals, laughed and loved well. May we look like Jesus in every way...especially this way.
