So, I educate them. I do so especially with my daughters knowing that the stats on a female being the victim are much higher. I watch videos with my oldest so she understands why social media isn't a part of her life.
In watching these videos, these men, sick in their sin, say things that make me cringe. They are depraved and allow themselves to sink into a dark feast of their flesh. They are the enemy and the threat and hatred swells even in my own heart for them as I am sickened by their intentions.
And then, as I conversed with that oldest child of mine, I looked up to see all four of my boys swimming in the pool. The Lord suddenly reminded me that these men who, even with my own story, I was villanizing, were at some point somebody's little boy...swimming carefree on a summer afternoon. Many of them with a loving Momma who never for one minute imagined that her son would be the villan in such a sick story.
But this isn't an article about the redemption of these lost men, although there is not one of them whose sin I believe to be too big for Jesus. This is about in remembering to protect our little ladies, we forget that one of the best courses of action is in working on the hearts of our young men.
What if there was a great movement of men pouring into these boys, educating them on the gift of sex and how the enemy has taken something the Lord meant for good and twisted and warped it into something full of lust and darkness. What if these men exposed porn for what it is, a bondage that wraps its tentacles so tight in your soul that once you are its slave, you will battle its hold on you for the rest of your life. Instead of encouraging sexualization of every female as though it was a requirement for manhood, they taught them to bounce their eyes to protect their heart and honor a girl even when she doesn't honor herself. Men modeling what it looks like to be vulnerable with their struggles and temptations and have other men around them to hold them accountable.
(Notice that there has never been a mention of shaming or guilting or forbidding. That is not the way.)
If you are of the tribe that "boys will be boys" and allowing them to lust over a magazine or website is what helps them become a "man", you are a fool to believe that it won't take them any deeper. It is exactly this willingness to minimize and overlook this "normal" behavior that digs the hole for them to dive into.
Will it matter? Will it decrease the number of "predators" on-line? Man, I don't know. But if I can take time to educate my kids on what to look out for fueled by my fear for their safety, I can surely take time to do my part to open their eyes to sin fueled by my knowledge that NO one is immune.
(This piece was never intended as a plug for my husband's ministry, Redemptive Sports, but there is no one who can speak to the lengths sexual sin can take you like he can. His whole mission behind his sports training ministry is to create an environment not only for young men, but their dads, and coaches etc. to have a place of Biblical community like the one mentioned above. A place where the consequences of typical narcissistic, flesh feeding behavior are not glamorized. If you haven't already, go check it out here.)
